Adding a sprinkle of “May” puns to the fun will make it even more fun. It is possible that you will say, “May the force be with you” or “May the sun shine brightly on your day.”
It may be a month of clever wordplay in May that makes people laugh. There’s a good chance you’ll love these puns so much you’ll make them your new May-nstays!
May brings flowers, sunshine, and the perfect excuse for some seasoned humor. These puns are light-hearted, groan-worthy, and gently crafted for our golden-age gigglers.
– I tried to plant memories in May, but all I got was thyme.
– May said, “Take it slow,” so I took a nap. Twice.
– This May, I’m in full bloom… or at least in full blossom.
– The best part of May? It’s finally warm enough to lose one of my cardigans.
– May told me to stretch—so I stretched the truth about exercising.
– I asked my knees how they’re feeling this May. They said “springy”.
– I told May I’d walk more. She didn’t say it had to be to the fridge.
– I have a May calendar full of exciting events. Just kidding—it’s full of reminders.
– May weather has me moving slower than a Sunday crossword.
– Retirement in May is like a flower: low-maintenance and full of sun.
– “Spring chicken?” More like “seasoned rooster.”
– May I interest you in a nap? It comes with cookies.
– These May mornings are brisk—just like my walking speed.
– I told May to “bring it on,” and it brought a new back pain.
– In May, everything is fresh except my jokes.
– Who needs spring cleaning when you can just rearrange dust?
– I’m starting a May dance class called “Tai Slow.”
– My gardening gloves fit better than my jeans—May-be that’s a sign.
– May I borrow your memory? Mine took a vacation.
– I blinked and it was May. Then I blinked again and forgot why I came into the room.
– In May, I bloom… after coffee.
– May gave me a second wind. Then took it right back.
– They say April showers bring May flowers. I say they bring joint aches.
– I tried to spring into May—landed in the recliner instead.
– May is the one month I don’t need an excuse to wear floral.
– My idea of May cardio is chasing the ice cream truck.
– May walks are nice, but May naps are blossom-worthy.
– May invited me outside. My allergies politely declined.
– If May had a scent, it’d be ben-gay and blossoms.
– May gives me a sense of re-leaf.
– My spring wardrobe? Mostly elastic.
– I told my neighbor I’d mow the lawn in May. I didn’t say which May.
– May’s weather is just right for sitting—indoors or out.
– The best part of May is watching everyone else garden.
– I may be retired, but my sense of humor still clocks in.
– May is when I switch from hot tea to iced tea—and back again by noon.
– May I tell you something? These jokes are vintage.
– May is a great month to reflect… on how little I want to do.
– I like my May days like I like my soup—slow-simmered.
– I used to sprint into May. Now I stroll.
– May flowers are blooming, just like my stories from 1957.
– I told my doctor I’m feeling springy. He said, “That’s your recliner.”
– May I be excused? My TV show is on.
– May is the month I go from ‘early bird’ to ‘afternoon napper’.
– The best view in May? Out the window, from my recliner.
– May is all about fresh starts—starting the same crossword again.
– I’m not old—I’m just May-ture.
– I look forward to May. Then I fall asleep halfway through it.
– May mornings are for slow stretches and slower coffee sipping.
– I treat May like a houseplant: sunlight, snacks, and soft music.
– May we meet again… right here, same chair, same tea.
May Dad Jokes
Dads thrive in May—lawn season, barbecue season, and of course, prime pun season. These dad-approved groaners are built for chuckles and cringes alike.
– May I interest you in a pun? No? I’ll do it anyway.
– I told May to stay cool. It said, “I’m spring-loaded.”
– May walked in. I said, “Well, look who just bloomed in.”
– I only make puns in May. It’s my seasonal dad-hibition.
– I asked May for flowers. It gave me allergies.
– This May, I’m grilling so hard, even the sun is jealous.
– I told my plants to grow. They said, “May-be.”
– May is like a dad joke—predictable, sunny, and slightly embarrassing.
– My lawn and I are in a May-long stand-off.
– May I mow your grass? Said no teen ever.
– I gave my wife a bouquet in May. She asked what I broke.
– My kids asked why I love May. I said, “It’s pun-derful.”
– May is for dad jokes and mowing diagonally.
– I asked Alexa for a May joke. She told my joke back.
– If May had a flavor, it’d be grill-seared and dad-approved.
– May weather is nice, but May puns are nicer.
– I’m not lazy—I’m in full May-tenance mode.
– May gave me a second wind… and I used it to blow up a pool float.
– May is my time to shine—mostly from forehead sweat.
– I cleaned the garage in May. Lost 3 tools and gained a raccoon.
– May I be funny? No? Too bad.
– My daughter said my May jokes were cheesy. I said, “Gouda one!”
– This May, I’m raising the barbecue and lowering expectations.
– My favorite May flower? Anything not followed by “you forgot our anniversary.”
– I built a birdhouse in May. The birds left a yelp review.
– I told the kids it was May. They said, “Cool.” I said, “Temperature-wise? Yes.”
– May is when I turn dad jokes into lawn sermons.
– Every May, I try a new grill recipe and a new pun. Usually both burn.
– May I just say—I’m the punniest man on the patio.
– May is short for “Maybe I’ll fix that tomorrow.”
– My wife loves May. I love being May-hem.
– I don’t spring clean—I spring quip.
– May means family picnics. And dad snoring on the blanket.
– The only thing fresher than May air is my joke game.
– May is when my jokes are fully pollinated.
– I made a joke about pollen. It didn’t land—like my kite.
– My May dance is called the “Lawn Sprinkler Shuffle.”
– May is for margaritas and mar-dad-asms.
– May I help? (Immediately breaks something.)
– May is when I blossom into full embarrassment.
– They call me the “May-n of the house.”
– May makes me emotional. Must be all the puns and petals.
– May is when I find out if the mower still works… or not.
– My dad jokes bloom like May flowers—often, loudly, and uninvited.
– I asked the kids if my May joke landed. They left.
– May I just say… no pun left behind.
– This May, I’m re-seeding my joke book.
– I don’t sweat in May—I glow with pun-tensity.
– I tried to plant a pun in May. It grew into this list.
– Every May, I get greener… mostly because of grass stains.
– May I joke now? Or is it May-be not?
May Jokes
Mildly naughty, all in good fun—these cheeky May puns keep it PG-13 but still saucy enough to make you smirk.
– I’m feeling a little May-nace to society.
– Ready to spring into some May-schief.
– Sun’s out, buns out—it’s officially May.
– Let’s get May-ssy.
– I’m in my May-ntenance required era.
– Caution: this picnic could turn steamy.
– May-ke love, not war… or at least flirt a little.
– We’re just two petals in a hot tub… six feet apart.
– Stop being so May-nipulative, I like it.
– May-ntally undressing you with my spring eyes.
– My plants aren’t the only thing getting spritzed.
– I like my tea iced and my intentions questionable.
– Flowers aren’t the only thing that bloom in May.
– Let’s make this spring… unforgettable.
– A little May-schief never hurt nobody.
– Wearing less, going out more—it’s May math.
– My spring fling senses are tingling.
– I’m not blushing, it’s just seasonal pollen.
– Let’s see what May brings… or who.
– This garden’s got some spicy secrets.
– The only thing rising faster than temps? My standards.
– Bees aren’t the only ones buzzing.
– Suns out, buns out, puns out.
– Sorry, what? I was distracted by your May-velous smile.
– Got that May-gnificent glow, and no shame.
– Let’s play hide and May-seek… with intentions.
– A little dirt never hurt… especially in May.
– Got a flower? I’ll show you a wild time.
– I said May-ke out, not make plans.
– Just out here pollinating vibes.
– I bloom best under pressure… and with compliments.
– Feeling naughty and a little chlorophyll-ed.
– Let’s pretend this is about plants.
– It’s not a thirst trap, it’s a hydration hint.
– May-ke no mistake, I came to flirt.
– This picnic blanket’s seen things.
– I’m spring-loaded and flirty.
– Did someone say petal-to-the-metal passion?
– I’m May-nly here for your digits.
– Love me like the sunshine—bold and reckless.
– Out here scandalizing butterflies.
– You’re the reason for my spring awakening.
– Your seasonal crush just bloomed.
– I’m not saying I’m trouble… but pollen sticks to me.
– Want to dew something wild?
– The only thing hotter than this weather? This look.
– I came for the flowers, stayed for the chemistry.
Rowan Blake, the founder of CraftyPuns.com, brings years of writing experience and a lifelong passion for clever wordplay. With a professional background in creative content, Rowan specializes in turning puns into an art form — delivering witty, polished, and unforgettable humor for readers who love a good laugh.
